I’ve never considered myself a stylish person. Historically when I shop for clothes, I am looking for two things – price and size. As long as the clothes fit and are within my price range, it’s a match made in shopping heaven. There was a time when clothes shopping was a fun experience. A time when I thought about what look I was going for. But that was before I became an adult.
I got married and had kids at a very young age. Andrew and I had low paying jobs, and fashionable clothes were never on the top of my priority list. Clearance racks and hand-me-downs from friends were lifesavers. Clothes were a necessity, not an extension of who I was. Not a way to show off my individuality.
But then I had my daughter, and she was born a fashionista. As a small child, she picked her outfits out with care. She had pizzazz. She had flavor. And when she got older, she wasn’t happy to shop at Target and Ross. She wanted me to take her to places like Hollister and Tilly’s. Shops I’d never set foot in. At first I didn’t know what to make of it. I felt like a fish out of water; like an old lady hanging out with a bunch of hipsters. Then I’d scurry off to hit up a department store that was more my speed.
But my daughter began challenging that thinking. She started pointing out clothes in her stores that she thought would look good on me. At first, I scoffed, telling her I was too old, too overweight or too frumpy to wear that. But I wondered what kind of message that was sending her. So, eventually I started trying things on. And guess what? I found that I wasn’t too old or too frumpy for those clothes. Some of them even looked good on me. And for the first time in my life, I could afford to buy the clothes I wanted – not just the ones on the clearance rack.
Ever since I was a kid, my weight has been a struggle for me. However, a few years ago I got sick, and I always say that one of the silver linings in my journey is that it’s forced me to lose quite a bit of weight. So that was another surprise – that the clothes fit me.
I started buying a top here, a skirt there. And pretty soon, I had a new wardrobe. Not only that but now when I enter a store I know exactly what kind of clothes I like, and what looks good on me. Surprise, surprise, I have a style. A look that is mine. A look that showcases me.
Sometimes when my daughter and I are shopping together, she’ll point out a shirt or dress and say, “Mom, that looks like you.” And she’s right. It’s odd that it took me 37 years to find my style.
But it makes sense too. Because style has a lot of factors. I think part of having a style is knowing yourself, and feeling good in your own skin. For the first time in my life I really feel confident in how I look. Not only that but I’m comfortable with me. I know me, and I like me. It’s freeing and liberating….and beautiful.
Being a confident mom is important. It teaches my daughter confidence and individuality. It gives her an example of how to love herself and feel good about herself at any age.
And that’s why we worked on this post together. My daughter took all the pictures, including choosing my poses. She is not a professional photographer and I’m no model, but we had fun doing this.